OMG!!! So lately my kids have been SO. BAD. I mean, really bad. They hit and scream at each other, they don't listen to me, or my husband. They tell me no, they talk back. Seriously, lately they are the kids in the store that you see and say, "Wow, they need a good butt whoopin'!" Or, "If my kids ever acted like that..." Or, " Those parents have no control over their kids!! How sad!" Really, I. AM. ABOUT. TO. LOSE. MY. MIND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I do NOT know how to correct their behavior! I have tried spanking, time outs, taking things away, sending them to their rooms, and explaining why something is not right to do. I give them "this" or "that" choices and I've even tried ultimatums with them. NOTHING. WORKS. ( I love my kids to pieces, I really do, I promise!) For example, for an ENTIRE week now Zoie has been trying to earn going to the store and spending her birthday money, and for an ENTIRE week she has not even come close to earning it. She knows she is trying to earn it. She asks me every other day if she has been good and if we can go get it, and every time I tell her she has not earned it for reasons A,B AND C (not OR, definitely AND). She just says OK, and continues on her way. UGHHHHHHH!!!!
So tonight we are at Smith's filling Kaija's prescription for a wonderful ear infection, Kaija is in the cart crying bc she wants to get out. I tell her no, she screams louder, whatever I can ignore that (kinda). Then Zoie is touching EVERYTHING on the shelves, so I tell her she needs to come stand by the cart and keep her hands to herself. I am waiting as the pharmacy tech is taking FOREVER to get the stupid medicine. I look back at the cart bc I hear Zoie and Kaija fighting. Zoie is standing in front of Kaija on her knees and Kaija is kicking her in the head. Does Zoie move?? NOOOOO, she starts screaming at Kaija and hitting her feet. I am trying to stay calm and collected, so I tell them to knock it off and for Zoie, who is now laying of the floor in front of the cart, to get up. She starts screaming louder. I. LOST. IT. BIG. TIME. I yanked her up by the arm, I don't think her feet ever touched the ground till I got right at her face level and gave her the sternest " THAT IS ENOUGH" I could muster without beating the snot out of her!!!! Mind you this entire time Kaija is STILL crying bc she still wants out of the effing cart. I turn around to FINALLY grab the stupid antibiotics and the lady says "you have your hands full". All the while, I am choking back serious MELTDOWN tears! I just give her a look like, "Really? I am about to beat the living snot out of my kids and you want to try and crack a joke?? Just give me my stupid medicine so I can get the eff out of here!" How embarrassing!! I mean, I know moms lose their cool (If you don't, you must be a robot, really). But to do it in public, right in front of someone??? OMG, I swear I am a put together person (most of the time), but anyone who witnessed me tonight would definitely think opposite!
I, of course, call Jonathan at work and tell him about my embarrassing act of rage. I thought for sure he probably already heard that some crazy mom at Smiths was abusing her kids over his radio at work. Luckily, there were no nosey, self righteous people that witnessed it, or he would have for sure had to respond to the crazy lady at Smiths, only to discover it was his WIFE! We both agree we have a serious problem on our hands and HAVE to stop it now, before they get any older. I think the next option we are going to try is a very strict, structured routine.
Something like this:
8am-8:30am- Eat Breakfast
8:30am-9:00am- Get dressed
9:00am-9:35am- Draw pictures
...you get the picture. Maybe my kids are some special kind that need a minute by minute routine. Lets hope it works, because I am on the verge of a SERIOUS meltdown!!
Any advice would be great.
Any similar stories would be even better so I don't feel like such a psycho parent, a failure as a parent I am alone in this!
I feel so much better! I feel the EXACT SAME WAY! I lost my cool completely at the mall, when 1st, Hyrum wouldn't stay by me no matter what I said or did, and then Ammon went poop, but didn't wipe his butt. And THEN Ammon when to scratch his not-wiped poop butt and got poop all over his fingers right in the middle of Motherhood Maternity. Meanwhile Hyrum is still running and screaming trying to get out of the store while my back is turned dealing with Ammon's Crap! I lost it. I actually did spank both of them and chewed them out. Ammon cried, Hyrum seemed unphased. I left the mall without trying on any maternity clothes vowing to never take my kids to the mall untill they're 8.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what to do with my kids right now either. They are about the same age as your girls, so maybe it's an age thing? I dunno. I'm just as frustrated.
Maybe it is the age. I dont know. Its frustrating to me too, especially when I see kids that are so quiet and listen to their parents. I always look at them puzzled, thinking, "THATS how I always pictured my kids to behave. What am I doing wrong?"
ReplyDeleteYou aren't doing anything wrong... kids, especially girls have issues. Gabi's nickname is naughty and has been for a few years. Somehow we manage to seem calm and collected out in public but oh my we have crazy tantrums and meltdowns at home. One day cyrus was upset at church, he managed to stay calm until we walked out the door. As soon as that door closed it was.... insane! The biggest fit he had ever thrown. For us the schedule helps a lot! They always know what's next and that helps out with transitions.
ReplyDeleteThose other are probably having an off day. Our kids all have off days where they are actually good.
ReplyDeleteEither that or the other kids are on drugs. :)
We have a basic routine, eat breakfast, get dressed, play around the house, eat lunch, go to park or run errands, naps... but imaybe it needs more stucture? Its definately something I will be working on tonight!
ReplyDeleteTiecha this post made me feel so much better! I lost it with Avery a couple days ago because she kicked the baby in the head, and have been suicidal ever since. I mean, what an asshole I am- shes TWO.
ReplyDeleteDoesn't it seem like good behavior comes in phases? Like sometimes Avery will have a great week, and then she'll be awful. She also started hitting- not kids or anyone else, just me and my husband and the baby. I think she's acting out as an adjustment to Landon? Who knows. All I know is you're doing great! (AND REMEMBER YOUR HORMONES ARE TOTALLY INSANE RIGHT NOW AND YOU ARE SUPER SENSITIVE AND MOST LIKELY BEING WAY TOO HARD ON YOURSELF!)
I totally agree! Today was a day of errands, 4 straight hours of running, with no naps... and they were SO GOOD! (I sure hope it lasts!) Maybe it was the near meltdown at Smith's, or the "prison food" dinner they got last night. (When they are really bad, and they want something special for lunch, I usually just give them a plain 'ol pb&j with some fruit, Jonathan calls it their prison food). Or they are scared of me after my psycho-ness lol. Either way, I was relieved! I do have to admit, this pregnancy is kicking my ass, (literally, it has gotten huge already) and I have absolutely no patience! Its frustrating...
ReplyDeleteKaija is my hitter, she hits Zoie ALL THE TIME!! No one else really. One time, and one time only, she hit me. It didn't go over too well. Hitting is a hard one, Zoie never did it, so I'm still learning how to deal with it, among other behaviors, obviously lol.
It's a good thing they SO freakin cute when they are being cute/good!